outback (MoFo 11)

After making these dishes from Outback, it is no wonder that this restaurant is at the top of the 'Worst Food for You," list. The restaurant conveniently places a calorie-nutritional value calculator on their website so you can see exactly how many calories you are shoveling in. The only additional thing they should add next is something to calculate the next pants size you will need after eating their creations.

Here we go:

The Bloomin' Onion is vastly popular. So much so that you can purchase a gadget set that will assist you in cutting the onion and dipping it in the batter. I've only seen them. To purchase one takes too much commitment, too much dedication to constant frying. 

Naturally, this was a hit. It takes a little finesse to cut the onion just right (without aforementioned gadget) and to get it coated well. I have created a How-To Breakdown for this, just in case you look at the pic and must have one of your own. It is great to do this with a large onion (~3/4#), but I tackled it with a small one because I figured it is easier for everyone to obtain a smaller onion than a larger one. The dip is a mayo-based concoction.

Now for the main meal: Outback's menu is 60% beef, but they manage to torture a few birds as well. I chose the Alice Sprigs Chicken to reinvent because it is a signature dish of theirs and, let's face it, it is covered in cheese. I must be too close to the Wisconsin border. 

And to accompany the bird, I present to you Outback's-and-possibly-the-world's-worst-food-only-being-beaten-by-KFC's-Double-Down (but that's another post): 

The Aussie Fries

Deep fried potatoes (you know, the kind that the public school system considers a vegetable), covered with a fair amount of salt, bathed in two different cheeses, and topped with crushed bacon.

Eh, yum..?

I used a mixture of shredded Daiya and Follow Your Heart Cheddar, but success can be had by using any bought or homemade nondairy cheese. To melt the cheese on both the chick'n and the fries, microwaving is your best bet; broiling does not melt vegan cheese as well as you would like - ooey, gooey. Nuke it.

Who is it who gets paid to think up stuff like this? The chicken is marinated in a honey-mustard sauce, grilled and topped with sauteed mushrooms, bacon (more?), and cheese.

 I used Tender Seitan cutlets, marinated them in maple-Dijon sauce, topped with sauteed mushrooms and Tofu (or Seitan) Bacon [see this post for the recipe and How-To Breakdown for the 'bacon'), and melted the Daiya/Follow Your Heart cheeses on it.

Making one or the other here and there is doable and even tasty (vegan, that is), but to have all three in one sitting at Outback can be downright dangerous!

To make me feel better, I am giving away Skinny Bitch in the Kitch by Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin. It is an adorable little book packed with recipes. To enter, just leave a comment. Contest ends around midnight on Tuesday morning, Nov. 23, and is open to North American and UK residents.

Cost Breakdown:

onion:

onion: $2

flour, spices: $1

cashew, almond milk: $1

dip: $1

Total to make 2 onions:

$4.00

fries:

fries: $3

FYH/Daiya: $2

'bacon': $1

Total to make 4 servings:

$6.00

chick'n:

seitan: $3

Daiya/FYH: $2

Dijon, veganaise, maple: $2

'bacon': $2

mushrooms: $3

Total to make 5 servings:

$12.00

Bloomin' Onion

Alice Sprigs Chick'n Plate



Aussie Chick'n



Aussie Fries

Bloomin' Onion Recipe

AUSSIE FRIES PRINTER-FRIENDLY RECIPE

Alice Sprigs Chick'n Recipe

How-To Bloomin' Onion

How-To for Outback